Hmmmm...
When I became a grandmother.. advice poured in from everywhere.. all contradictory to each other.. some of it mired in old customs, some practical and some simply idiotic.
Finally I chose to follow the doctor and just ignored the others. Some persistent advisers had to be firmly told to refrain and this was not a comfortable task. Yet it had to be done.
A few years ago, when I tried to give Advice to my newly married daughter, I was gently but firmly turned away. Naturally I was a bit upset.. But when I heard her explanation, I thought my heart and head would burst with pride.
"Did you not do everything by yourself Ma living in far away isolated places? Then why can I not do so in the city?" (She was referring to our stays in remote places in India where my Fighter Pilot husband was posted.)
I had obviously done something right to have brought up a sensible girl.
Thereafter I stepped back and made it known that I was available if and when she needed help or advice.
I followed this through her pregnancy and now even as the baby is growing.
Bottom line, give advice when asked for.
Similarly, when in need, seek advice without inhibition or fear of what people will say. For everything else there is Google! ;-)
Do you face an Advice overload? How do you deal with it?Are you a prolific advice-giver?
I am sure my thoughts may cause a deja vu to some of you especially someone who has hosted a newborn! I would love to hear from you!
Here are links to my previous AtoZ attempts.
2013 Mixed Bag
2014 Exercising For Fitness
2015 Gardens of Pune
2016 Herbs
2018 Contemporary A to Z
2019 Caring for the Caregiver
See you tomorrow folks! I would love to hear from you!
Disclaimer: My posts do mention some products or service providers but these are not sponsored and not meant to be an advertisement. All posts from a maternal grandma's point of view!!
12 comments:
So proud of you and your daughter!
May we have more strong women.
Advice must be given to those who seek it.
Giving it to people, who don't bother, really puts the advice-giver in a disrespectful position. What is the advice-receiver is rude and insults us?
Great that you have completed so many A2Z challenges, apart from challenges in life!
Stay Safe. Best wishes :)
Oh gosh! I am a chronic advice giver, although I try not to be. I always feel so icky after I do, so it is really to my benefit to stop. Working on it. My daughter, bless her generous soul, takes me in stride. I strive to be better!
I'm definitely not an advice giver...nor taker I think. But I do believe in consulting the relevant experts ie the pediatrician in the case of babies, sooner rather than later. For the less important stuff, prefer to sort out things myself. :)
Great starting post for the A-z!
@Anita Thank you so much! Best wishes to you too!
@Lael That's the specialty of a mother daughter-relationship!! You are blessed !! Thank you for sharing your thoughts! :-)
@Nilanjana That's what we try to follow! Thank you for stopping by :-)
Hi Archana. Well, it is heartening to have a relationship where one can frankly say "I don't need your advice" and the other person accepts it and even happily writes about it.
Unfortunately, most of us live with unsolicited advice and then try to follow cliches like 'Listen to everyone, do what you wish'.
Oh! You can definitely take pride in your daughter. Kudos to both of you. :)
That's amazing! congratulations on becoming a grandmother! Wish you all the happiness
@Nimi Yes, i do understand and I have been in that phase .. I managed to come out if it .. Thank you for sharing your thoughts!
@Shweta Thank you so much! Your wishes mean a lot! :-)
@Sinjana Thank you so much!
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